Saturday, 2 August 2008
Sunday, 22 June 2008
Arnolds Birth and the lead up to the Infamous Egg and Spoon Race
The first day I met Arnold I was a big nervous.
From speaking to him on the phone he gave off this air of superiority.
Mind you this may have had something to do with the fact that he is an Aardvark and he can both use and speak into a phone. Cant say I have met many creatures that can do that. Mind you as this story unfolds I will encounter more and more strange and unusual creatures in Arnolds life.
Almost immediately we got down to business and he started tell me his story and here it is;
At this point Arnold went quiet and we stopped the interview. It will continue again tomorrow
From speaking to him on the phone he gave off this air of superiority.
Mind you this may have had something to do with the fact that he is an Aardvark and he can both use and speak into a phone. Cant say I have met many creatures that can do that. Mind you as this story unfolds I will encounter more and more strange and unusual creatures in Arnolds life.
Almost immediately we got down to business and he started tell me his story and here it is;
My name is Arnold. Arnold the Aardvark and I was born in a place called Chipping Norton in the south of England. A place that my parents were very proud to call their home. A place that over time I grew to hate and despise, mainly due to a little cocktail sausage called Kevin. I don't want to digress at the moment and we will cover him in more detail later on in the story of my life.
So I was born to Leslie and Tarquin Aardvark of the Chipping Norton Aardvark. A family that has quite a history in shaping the country over the years. Please do not think by any means the family had lordly connections. In fact the opposite they were a humble but very hard working and strong family that were never afraid to get stuck in for the right cause. Or indeedy even for the wrong one as uncle Jeremiah did during the second world war.
There was Tarquin and Leslie so proud of their new son . . .me . . .Aarnold. And did I let them down as I grew up. No in fact they were so proud of me and my achievements that they actualy had a cast iron statue made of me and put in their front garden foe all to see. Something that Kevin the sausage, who as I grew up was my friend, grew to despise . . .he became bitter and twisted at all my great successes. Little did I know that when we played in the garden such games as "Hide the Sausage" and "grab the big fat worm" he was secretly plotting my downfall . . . . . . . I was totaly unaware of this until THAT fateful day on my 8th birthday (in human terms this would have made me 15) . . . that is a day I will never forget
It is the Day of the infamous Egg and Spoon race . . . . .
So I was born to Leslie and Tarquin Aardvark of the Chipping Norton Aardvark. A family that has quite a history in shaping the country over the years. Please do not think by any means the family had lordly connections. In fact the opposite they were a humble but very hard working and strong family that were never afraid to get stuck in for the right cause. Or indeedy even for the wrong one as uncle Jeremiah did during the second world war.
There was Tarquin and Leslie so proud of their new son . . .me . . .Aarnold. And did I let them down as I grew up. No in fact they were so proud of me and my achievements that they actualy had a cast iron statue made of me and put in their front garden foe all to see. Something that Kevin the sausage, who as I grew up was my friend, grew to despise . . .he became bitter and twisted at all my great successes. Little did I know that when we played in the garden such games as "Hide the Sausage" and "grab the big fat worm" he was secretly plotting my downfall . . . . . . . I was totaly unaware of this until THAT fateful day on my 8th birthday (in human terms this would have made me 15) . . . that is a day I will never forget
It is the Day of the infamous Egg and Spoon race . . . . .
At this point Arnold went quiet and we stopped the interview. It will continue again tomorrow
Saturday, 21 June 2008
Part1 - The Beginning
This is the story of a very special Aardvark called Arnold.
He contacted me approximately 2 months ago to scribe his biography whilst he attempts his goal of World Domination.
I have been charged with following his life on a day to day basis.
Great Leader?
Sublime Lover?
Dangerous Assasin
Or simply an Ardvark with a strange ambition?
Follow his story and then you can decide.
ENJOY
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